Category Archives: Telegrams

Suicidal Tendencies Part I

Let me go into the darkest corner of the room, out of sight
Lie lifelessly in the emptiness and slowly die
Cause I’ve given up and lost the fight
I don’t bother to rise up and try

I want to disappear and leave no trace
Forgotten from existence, I’ve fallen from grace
I’m so tired, I’m driven into madness
Just let me die, in this darkness

Written on October 21st, 2014. 

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That’s How Much I Miss You

I put your picture as my wallpaper
Read your messages everyday
Giggle to the things reminded me of you
Recalling the tone of you voice
Sometimes mimicking how you speak
Looping your smile in my head
Rubbing my fingers as if I’m caressing your hair
Taking a deep breath to catch your scent

That’s how much I miss you

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I Never Felt Like I Lost You

I sang the same song over and over again
I just couldn’t cry
I wasn’t feeling sad enough
To have tears rolling down my cheeks

I wonder if I should cut myself
To feel the hurt I have inside
But it would be a waste of blood
As your absence don’t hurt me much

Maybe I should shave my head
Just to let off some steam
But I was never angry
When you walked out the door

I never felt like I lost you

I know you’ll return
And here I’ll wait for you

Unwilling

I would go to the mountains
Let my love for you echo when I scream
Let my desire for you rustle through the trees
Flowed by the stream
Whispered through the wind
Sang by the birds
How wonderful you are to me
How beautiful it is when you’re with me

But with our love it is not possible
Where we are it is just difficult
I have too much love inside me that it hurts
Eventually my heart will burst
I hold back not to get killed
Little did I know inside it kills
Our love is forbidden
Unwillingly hidden

A House Is Not A Home

A house is not a home
Because her heart turned to stone.

A house is not a home
Because she lost her cheerful tone.

A house is not a home
Because she is gloomy and all alone.

A house is not a home
Because she died inside and her spirit is gone.

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I Am My Father

I always wonder how I would hold my son
Swim at the beach under the summer Sun
Be at his side when he learns how to shave
And no matter what comes, I’ll tell him to be brave
Share with him on life and girlfriends
Not just a father, but I’ll be his best friend
I’ll cheer for him on his football game
Or just sitting together, laughing on jokes so lame.

I promised myself that I would never be
Like the father I had when he raised me
Raised my son like how I wanted to be
But I am afraid that would never be
Because on the mirror is not just a reflection of me
I am my father and my father is me.

The Dancer

She danced gracefully to the strumming of the sape
Took steps so effortlessly as if walking on clouds
Mesmerizing are the angelic sways of her hands
I fell in love with her instantly
As she turned around and our eyes met

Her name was beautiful as the Moon
A pure soul, she emanated kindness
Spoke softly, her smile was priceless
I was speechless and in awe
Why have I never seen her before?

Little did I know, I wasn’t the only one
I pursued for her hand, so were other men
Played my cards carefully
For a love so true, I couldn’t afford to lose

I thought I had her
How could I not think as such,
When I really felt it inside?
I won, but not how I wanted
I lost, as her heart wasn’t mine

Just like the Moon who turned her darkness towards Earth
I let her go and she walked away
And at last she found her Sun
Together making an eclipse that forever lasts
Shining together creating wonders and beauty
As for I,
I could only watch her from far away.

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